xaq (atomizerzz11) wrote,
xaq
atomizerzz11

now

at least i wrote to her. if only i didn't drink so much, i might actually remember do do things when i'm supposed to. i do remember, however, that i'll never lose sight of the poeple i care about. i may e-mail them a little late though....
there was a time in my life when i felt i had no one. it sucked to be sure! although it did give me the opportunity to begin surrounding myself with poeple of honesty, integrity, and goodwill. and at this point i know that i'll never be without someone who'll be there if i need them, and every one of my signifigant others knows that as well.
it's a terrible thing when you have to live with yourself after you've treated someone like this unfairly. last night i was so unfair to a very important person in my life. she said she understood and that it didn't matter. it does though. because her time was wasted telling me what i already know in the first place! she also said i have great eyes. they won't be so pretty when i gouge them out as penance for my ability to be the most ridiculas human on the planet! anyway.
all i can do is live with it and try to be a little less idiotic next time. same ol'...
i hope that i never stop seeing my mistakes. poeple have told me that i'm overly analitical, maybe i am, but seriously, how else do you grow and/or change? don't you have to see the things about yourself that need fixing in order to change it? yes. i'll be as analitical as i want if i think it's helping me to become a decent individual.
mabye the stars won't be so bight next time.....
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